Silent Dreams

When I first made a facebook, I had a silent, secret dream to one day create a really awesome group like Eat Red Jello and Save the Rain Forests, and millions of people would join it. That dream never happened and then one day I realized groups are the dumbest thing ever. Except for this one I saw once called "Buffalo Buffalo Buffalo...". It was a group about this. PLEASE go to it. It's amazing.

I got a text last January that said:
"They always said when a Black was nominated President of the US, pigs would fly. And sure enough, when Barack Obama was inaugurated, swine flu."

I got the swine flu vaccine today.

MTC IN 5 DAYS!!! I have so much to do and not enough time to do it.

Henrietta

Today was a good day.

It was my second-to-last day of work. It was sunny and 70deg after being cold and rainy for a week straight. The leaves were beautiful and driving in the car while listening to Jack Johnson is almost always a good idea.

I taught piano lessons to funny children. I dance and make weird voices throughout the lesson and we have good laughs. It's bad though because they've stopped respecting/ fearing me as their teacher.

My dad forwards me emails from his MTC companion's son who is serving in Romania. I read them because missionaries are suddenly interesting now that I'm soon to be one three weeks from today. He's kooky and hilarious and ridiculous. I emailed him once even though I don't even know him. He responded today! Great letter, a Romanian penny and a pass along card included.

I ate a fruit leather.

Today was a sad day.

Sometimes I have no idea what I am doing going on a mission. When I invite my friends to hear a message about the gospel, they're never interested. I just want so badly for people to know what they are missing...So they can stop missing it! If they just knew what was right in front of their eyes, they would hate me for not inviting them sooner. The gospel of Jesus Christ changes lives. It brings more happiness, satisfaction...fulfillment than anything else on this planet. It brings us closer to God than anything else. World, WAKE UP! Please wake up.

There are days when I can't imagine not going on a mission. There are days when I get a stomach ache from excitement. There are days when I realize how short 18 months really is; and how fast it's going to fly.

Then there are days when serving feels like the hardest, most unnecessary thing possible. How's that for flaws? I wish I wasn't so flawed sometimes. Still, today is one of those days. Am I ready to forsake my life; my friends; my freedom? Am I ready to risk everything for the Lord? I am and will always be ready to risk everything for the Lord. If we put our trust in Him, He will provide. I have faith. But sometimes it's easier to know something deep inside, than to envision it actually happening at some point.

On a lighter, less ambiguous note, I usually call Henry "Henrietta." He...ironically protests quite strongly to my endearing nickname. The other night he said he would start calling me Perrywinkle. (As if he was going to offend me with that??) I said, "Would you rather be a perrywinkle or a perrytwinkle?" He said A PERRYWINKLE! I questioned his immediate and opinionated response. "TWINKLE MEANS PEE." Can you guess what my new nickname for him is?

Debate Club

I'm laying in bed debating whether or not I should get up and go running. The risk of that is getting Hannah Montana songs stuck in my head for the rest of the day.

Vile Piles of Files

Today has been a very alphabetical day. Allow me to explain.

I work in a sad little place where the senior citizens flow like wine, and Microsoft Word is still in the 2003 version. This summer I have been temping for a lady on maternity leave, and she finally returned this past Monday. I never thought I would see the day, but yes, miracles happen. My boss Rita asked me to stay on board for some time until I leave in November, and I thought it was a dream come true. An opportunity to make more moolah! Don't say moolah.

Turns out, all I do is FILE. ALL DAY. EVERYDAY. I'm so sick of alphabetizing records. In the mornings I'll begin to alphabetize my socks until I realize that you CAN'T alphabetize socks. Not in this era, anyway.

The one good thing that has come of today was around noon I realized there really, truly is one good thing about the name Mckenna: It comes before Mckenzie in the alphabetical order. AH DANG IT. As I'm typing this now I just realized that most people spell it Mackenzie, don't they. I can never win.

Taiwow

CHILDREN OF THE AMAZON:

How dare I leave the cyberoptic* world in troubled suspense over my mission call! It's like you would have thought I died or something. Welp, here it is..................!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OO1p4kNKT4

I try to be really bad and cool in my blog, and act like I'm apathetic towards life and the things that happen to me.

But this.
is.
SO.
COOOLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am SOOO EXCITED, I just want to leave right now! I still have two months to go, and it is painstakingly slow. I have no idea how the heck I'm going to learn Chinese. I wish I was more concerned about it, because that would lead me to action and actually trying to learn it. I don't have much motivation because I don't know where to start! I'm going to ride a bike and wear a skirt and eat tofu everyday and possible even learn to like it, and obey rules (I've never obeyed a rule in my life), and actually go to bed at a decent hour (like that's even possible) and do so many impossible things!!!! Most importantly I get to study/preach the gospel 24/7 for 18 months and isn't that the best part of it all? To be a full time representative of Jesus Christ and labor with all my heart, might, mind and strength to bring souls to Him! How miraculous and wonderful and life changing.

Oh, and don't mind the blubbery babyness of the movie, it's all for effect. ;)

Speaking of emotions, aren't tears a funny sort of thing? Why does liquid exit the eyeballs when happiness, sadness or laughter is experienced? I am sure I'm not the first person to have wondered that. When we went boating in Maine this summer, my dad was teaching my sisters and I that when we get up on water skis or a wake board, it's tempting to freak out the first second you stand up because you are so happy that you won the war against the water, and then, you fall immediately. God must bring us down with our weaknesses before He lifts us back up! Dad then taught us the phrase, "Keep it together, keep it together, keep it together." He encouraged us to recite that in our heads when we're losing our cool. I have to tell myself that when I start to cry sometimes. The phrase comes in handy in a variety of situations.


* I'm not sure what cyberoptic means, but I'm pretty sure it means something.

The nightmare before Christmas

Tomorrow is a very big day.

I'M GOING TO GET MY MISSION CALL!!!!!!!! Who would have ever seriously thought that I of all people would go on a mission. I know everyone is surprised because all my life I have been a 15 year old bright-eyed beehive that fruits around and is in love with the world. WELL I TURNED AROUND. ACTUALLY I DIDN'T. I'm still the same wombat girl but the difference is I'm a wombat girl with a purpose now.... A mission, if you will.

Anyway, I have had tyrannosaurus rex butterflies in my stomach all day and I can't even breathe. I keep giggling uncontrollably and I have no appetite, but I only eat because I'm nervous.

My call should arrive around noon and I get off work at one. Typical Stephen the Beast has decided to grace the city with his presence and I have no idea when he is getting home. It's so unfair that I have to wait for a brother that shows no interest in my mission anyway! And he probably isn't even getting home until 5 or 6! Ray; my buddy, my man, my brothah from anothah mothah who is my partner in crime that is also preparing for a mission, is going to his aunt's at three tomorrow... so Steve's selfishness is possibly preventing Ray from being there. I really want Ray there. It's bad enough that Stew won't even be there; my brother who was there for me in the process of making this decision. He gave me the vision of serving a mission, he helped me find this path.

Ok I had to get the complaining out of my system. I am just so excited, I want it to be perfect!!!! Thank goodness my sisters will be there. Elder Raey and Elder Call, the missionaries in my ward who have taught a lot of discussions in our house, cancelled their exchanges tomorrow so they can both be there! It's so sweet. I feel like I'm really going to open it with my family this summer. It's a nice thought. However, a part of my family is missing; a few of my best friends are in other states at the moment and it really, really stinks. :(










Because I am going on an 18-month mission and therefore will miss two Christmases, I decided today that I will listen to only Christmas music until I leave so I get all the cravings out of my system. Not that I can't listen to all Christmas music on my mission, but Britney Spears "My Only Wish" probably is a no no (I love that song).

People Who Need People

Well hootenanny. I've been rebuked by Shmaudrey, Larin, Mierra, Nashley and Fro (code names. this is the internet people) for not updating my blog recently. Ok actually I haven't. I know if I don't correct this, Audrey will write some snotty little comment about how no one has told me to update it. Whatever

At my desk job, I'm given an affluent amount of time to ponder life and the eternities, and I've come to 3 conclusions:

1. Alphabet letters definitely have genders. For example, A is a girl. B, C, and D are boys. E is a girl. F is a boy. G is a girl. H- boy. I- girl. J is a femmy man. K is a manly man. L is french- a boy. A french boy. M and N are girls. O is a boy and P is a girl. Q and R are men (Q is probably Middle Eastern), and S is a girl. T is flashy and feisty- maybe a Spice Girl. U is an airplane steward, V is a guy, W is a girl, X guy, Y girl (actually this one is open to debate), Z boy. For all you folks out there who's first initial-gender does not match your gender, life goes on.

2. All I want for my the rest of my birthdays is bubble wrap. A lot of it.

3. Of all the crazy ways people have manipulated my name over the years, I think my favorite nickname so far is what my little sister Jane calls me: Miss Keena.

People are funny.

Last night my dad's former boss who is Dutch and lives in Belgium brought her family to our house to visit. We were scared that the Finer Thing's Club aka Europeans in our living room would judge us for being ugly Americans. The husband was a darling little French man with a strong personality. I wish I wasn't so awkward when they went in for the smooch on the cheek (I do love that piece of their culture, by the way. It's dainty and cute). I guess I did good because when I met the family I just got one kiss and when they left, some of them gave me two and even three!

I watched my poor mother say goodbye to Jon Luke and give him a friendly bear hug when he went in for the kiss. Maybe he was scared, but maybe he also liked it.

People are flirty.

The 16 year old girl Rachel only spoke French. It was difficult; actually impossible to communicate with her, except through her older brother Frederick who spoke some English. I smiled at her a lot last night to make her feel welcome. It might have turned creepy at points. Olivia looked up the phrase, "Do you think he's buff?" in French on the internet, and asked it to Rachel as she pointed at Steve. At one point we heard mom in the kitchen say to her, "What kind of soda would you like?" and she answered, "I speak French," so mom said, "Oh, that's ok! Help yourself to whatever you like!" We decided mom talked to her in english for a total of 8 minutes last night.

Steve took French in high school so he tried saying a couple simple phrases to Rachel at the beginning because he felt sorry for her; he knows what it's like to be in a country and not speak the language. Apparently that meant that my 24-year old brother was interested in the 16 year old. She flirted with him the rest of the night. She gazed at him as he played piano. She sat next to him when possible and pinched his arm. When he tried to ignore it, she tickled his chest. I guess I can't blame her.

People are babies.

I work with a parking agency of a town nearby, so we get the usual people who call in to complain about problematic meters that are reading 'failed', won't accept coins, etc. Last week a man called and informed me that he inserted 35 cents, but the meter didn't clock the time. So he moved to another meter and inserted 35 more cents, and it worked. However, he had to pay twice. He insisted on getting his 35 cents returned to him at once. He kept explaining to me that it wasn't about the money so much as "The Principle of the 35 Cents." I told him he could fill out a refund form, it would take a few weeks to process because Council has to approve the matter, and then we would issue him a check for $0.35. He didn't seem to like that idea. SIR, IF YOU REALLY WANT, I WILL JUST GIVE YOU 35 CENTS MYSELF. The principle of the 35 cents. Great title for a book, don't you think?

Things you can buy with 35 cents....
Tolls for the Garden State Parkway
Juicy Fruit in a vending machine
3 jolly ranchers at the pool with 5 cents to spare
a gumball
7 nickels is surely enough for one sweet game of DDR at NickelCade
a sweet toy at Acme's old 25c toy machine
A handful of dirty mikeNikes or Reeces Pieces at a gas station

I guess the man was right. 35 cents is a lot more than we realize.

People are old.

Everyone I work with except for like one guy is 30 years my senior. And everyday at least one comment is made about my youth. Actors and bands and movies...have I heard of them? WHY OF COURSE NOT! I WASN'T EVEN BORN YET! I sit next to a sarcastic, witty woman named Michelle and she makes more comments out of anyone-but they're always about stupid 20 year olds in general- never officially directed towards me. But the other Andy down the hall comes and tells us a story about a 20 year old who was hitting on his wife, and how all 20 year old guys only think about one thing. And he's just philosophizing about the existence of 20 year olds in general, and Michelle of course opens her big mouth and says, "Yeah, I sit next to a 20 year old all day, IT DRIVES ME NUTS!" Umm Michelle I don't do anything to you. I don't even talk to you. You are just old. Stop taking your oldness out on me. (This is a good thing to say to parents that are bothering you. Don't try this at home, kids.)

People like cross word puzzles.

It's the funniest thing, a few people I work with literally meet in the lunchroom every day on their break and do crosswords together. I think it's the highlight of their lives. And I gotta hand it to them- they are good! They always try to get me to come and participate, and usually I just sit there blankly staring as they throw out 4 letter words for hyperventilation like it's nobody's business. Maybe it's something you get good at with practice. Maybe the knowledge just comes with age. And every time there's a 3-letter word that ends in 'x', they get so excited. And when it turns out to be 'box' or 'mix', they are sorely disappointed.

People say things you wouldn't expect.

There is a lovely lady named Jean who is very sweet and demure. She always smiles at me as if I'm her daughter. If I hadn't known any better, I would guess this woman sings to homeless children in her spare time and donates expensive household items to charitable organizations.

The week of July 4, I bumped into her in the copy room and made friendly conversation about the upcoming holiday. In response to my question about her plans, she said, "I'm going to get so hammered this weekend." Can people get hammered at 50? I'm actually not even positive I know what hammered means. I'm pretty sure it means drunk. But I thought only kids on Dude Where's My Car use that term.

People are blind.

A man came in for a permit a few weeks ago, and I grabbed the form off the wall as we politely conversed. When I asked him to fill it out, he abruptly said, "I CAN'T SEE. You are going to have to fill it out for me." I nervously laughed and said, "Oh, of course," as if I should have just assumed that he was blind. In my mind I was wondering if this man should be driving a vehicle under his circumstances. At the bottom of form the resident is supposed to sign his/her name. I was afraid to ask the man to do it, so on the line in parenthesis I wrote, "He is blind."

People are sisters and go tubing with their cousins in Maine.




I've never seen Dude Where's My Car, by the way.